In 2018 my husband and I bought a farmhouse on an acre in a small, country town. We had all the same questions that any loving parent would want to know: Were we doing the right thing? Were we making the right decision for our family? We closed on our farmhouse without having ever seen another child in the neighborhood, trusting our hearts that it was the right move. Here I will share all the reasons why it has been wonderful beyond our wildest dreams in the hopes that it brings peace, comfort and excitement as you consider a potential move.
The Country is Calling
There is a reason millions of American families are finding their souls drawn towards dreams of a country life. Fresh air, sunshine, grassy open spaces, climbing trees, babbling creeks for fishing and room for family fire rings under the stars increasingly feels like the wholesome antidote to a modern life that is becoming far too stressful. Your instincts are correct: our family has enjoyed all of these things regularly since our move and they are wonderfully restorative! You can trust these guiding thoughts that come to your mind, even if you fear you are romanticizing country life. A move may be the exact thing you need to extract yourself from an overwhelming schedule and sell a few of the addictive electronics as you pack up your home. (You do not need to wait for a move to free yourself from anything you currently find constraining but I understand how the upheaval of a move can draw families together and encourage them to more quickly shed what is unnecessary.)
Simple Living Closer to Nature
One of the best ‘side effects’ of moving was that everything was packed up with only the beds moved in first. Our son, who was eleven at the time we closed on the farmhouse, had his possessions in boxes in a storage unit. Because of this, he was immediately drawn to exploring outside. We were unloading the U-Haul in the sweltering July heat while he kept bursting excitedly into the house with a leaf or a lizard or some other natural oddity to show us. He was thrilled with the new property and so much outdoor space. He was up a tree, down at the back fence line, rummaging through the brush and overturning the rocks lining the flower bed all at the same time. Unpacking his room could wait until after sunset; there was so much to explore. The plastic critter keeper and a nature book were among the initial things he unboxed because they were what he wanted to use. The first days at the new house seem to set the tone so let the children explore, even if it means bedrooms are not unpacked until a little later.
The Preciousness of Childhood is Never Squandered Outside
Time has flown by and we are now raising a teenager in the country. I wish we would have moved sooner, when he was younger, so he could have enjoyed the outdoors even more. I’ve shared how quickly we saw our son begin to thrive in the country, growing physically strong, confident and kind. The transformation happened quickly and it alone was worth every penny spent and every moving hassle endured. Long, dreamy summer days of playing in the woods from sun up until sundown soak goodness into a child’s soul. Gathering at the end of the day for backyard grilled burgers or fire roasted s’mores forge the ties that bond strong, healthy families together.
The Goodness of Outdoor Play Space
There is something magical about having the natural space and moments to be alone with the trees and wild animals that is so grounding. You truly do not need millions of dollars and acres of land to provide this; we are on a single acre in a neighborhood with a nature trail that borders a creek system. Our son has access to this and to two friend’s properties that also have creeks cutting through them where they play. Acreage homes on the outskirt of town can be phenomenal places to grow up!
How a Country Move Can Break Your Children Free from Screens
Country life makes freeing your children from screen addictions a little easier. New country houses can come with new family rules. It may seem like an act of war to separate your children from their devices while living in the suburbs, where there isn’t enough nature nearby to distract them, but a move can help provide the reasoning needed to make a change. Many of us parents comment that once the kids have their own video games, TVs, tablets, laptops and phones, it is nearly impossible to get them to part with any of it. Sleeping in dark, cozy bedrooms where you can see a sky full of stars through your window and hear the crickets chirp is refreshing for the whole family. The layout of the house you purchase can help. Our home came with a front formal dining room that we turned into a school room and craft project room, where we also eat family dinner every night at the big farmhouse table. In our home there is only one TV in the living room and electronics “sleep” overnight in the school room on chargers so our bedrooms are safe havens of peace for restorative sleep. If you are feeling drawn to the country to escape some of the things you fear are slowly enslaving your children, consider taking advantage of the move to make the changes you crave, whatever they are.
Schools in the Country
You may be shocked to discover the additional educational opportunities available to your children in the country. Yes, the public schools will be further away than what they are in the suburbs but I promise you will adjust to the drive time. The further distance also fosters responsibility in your children, who quickly learn they must do without anything they carelessly leave at home that day. It only takes learning that lesson once for a formerly forgetful child to become much more thoughtful about their possessions! In the country you’ll notice there may be more home schooled children or educational co-ops and small private schools. Tuition prices are often reasonable and the opportunity they provide your child may be once-in-a-lifetime. If you are considering home schooling, your own property will provide a bounty of never-ending discoveries and discussions that drive your children’s curiosity. I have home schooled both in the suburbs and in the country and I can assure you, it is significantly easier to do in the country. (The peace and quiet with its absence of ringing doorbells and distractions is just one of the many benefits!)
Are there Other Children in the Country?
YES! There are a number of other children already living in the country and more moving in every day in droves. Your children are likely to have a number of playmates nearby, especially if you are living in a neighborhood of acreage home sites. Even if your property is a bit off the beaten path, they will still have school friends and those they meet doing various clubs or activities.
New Country Hobbies
Have you wanted a garden or berry patch where your children could pick their own home-grown fruits and veggies? Do you dream of owning hens who lay rich, buttery-tasting fresh eggs? These are wholesome desires and your house hunt should include properties that allow poultry and livestock ownership. Every spring when the feed stores are filled with fluffy baby chicks, raspberry bushes, herb starts and tomato seedlings, one cannot help but feel the allure of home food production. The gentle cycling of the seasons – which you live much closer to in the country – bring a sense of well-being. I would encourage you to select a home in a neighborhood that allows the building of a garden and the keeping of chickens. Your children will treasure the experience and the memories will be worth more than gold. (It is fair to warn you now that properties with deed restrictions which forbid the ownership of livestock are much harder to sell later. Do not buy a house where the HOA is “about to vote on chickens”. This is a common ploy used to sell a home with undesirable neighborhood restrictions.)
The Farmhouse Kitchen
Even if bread baking isn’t on your list of hobbies to pursue, rolling out fresh pizza dough for a delicious homemade pizza makes for a delightful family dinner. A big country kitchen quickly becomes the heart of the home where baskets of fresh eggs and bowls of local produce greet the inhabitants. When fast food is further away, it is easier to teach your children how to cook with healthy, from-scratch ingredients. (I can quickly walk you through how to handle living further from the grocery store and creating a well-stocked pantry.) Family time in the kitchen with whole foods and nourishing meals is just one of the benefits you may enjoy, in addition to the nearby fresh farmer’s markets. Do not be surprised if your eating habits naturally shift to become healthier and everyone seems a little bit trimmer with so much additional outdoor time.
What Do Families Do For Fun In The Country?
There is so much to do and there are lots of other families to enjoy activities with! Because life really does more closely follow the seasons out here, I’m going to list common activities by the season we enjoy them:
Spring
Watching Chick Hatches! (Offered by local schools, 4-H clubs and neighbors with incubators)
Visiting farms & feed stores to select new baby chicks to raise (add new laying hens every 1-2 years)
Family Fun Farms open on weekends with seasonal activities, petting zoos, food trucks and events
Spring Flings for kids begin with activities through Spring Break week
Day hikes at local State Parks where the weather is delightfully pleasant and flowers are in bloom
Vegetable gardening classes offered by independently owned local nurseries
Easter Egg Hunts & small carnivals offered by numerous local churches to the community
Farmer’s Markets open, usually near cute Antique/Home Decor stores on the town square
Summer
You-Pick Farms are open from May through October/December (berries, veggies, fruits, flowers)
Family Fun Farms offer the height of activities, water play, lake swims & events
Small, independently owned Water Parks open
Community BBQ and Chili Cook Offs Begin (multiple per season) and Sno Cone stands open
Fireworks stands open for July 4th and you are allowed to shoot them off in the country!
Local State Parks offer kid’s classes, hands-on reptile days and other educational events
Day Trips to historical sites and parks (that are now closer than when you lived in the city)
Horseback Riding Lessons and Horse Camps begin at the local stables for kids, teens & adults
Summer Camps hosted by nearby camp grounds, local churches and kid’s clubs run all summer
Vacation Bible School for grade school children offered by numerous local churches
The local library will have weekly crafts, classes and activities for grade school children
Roadside farm stands begin offering incredibly sweet watermelons, peaches and local honey
Local wineries begin offering tastings, socials and evenings out for parents
Fall
Pumpkin Patches at the You-Pick Farms open September through October
Corn Mazes and Hay Rides at the Family Fun Farms are offered every weekend
Fall Festivals & Carnivals hosted by the community, schools & local churches run every weekend
Trunk-or-Treat events for kids begin (kids trick-or-treat in a safe parking lot going car to car)
Pet Costume, Kid Costume & Candy Parades begin
Harvest Parades & Food Festivals begin (nearby small towns typically host them as well)
Local restaurants will offer live music as the evenings cool off with specials to try their fare
Winter
Community Holiday Lighting parades & events begin right after Thanksgiving
Cut-Your-Own Christmas Tree Farms open around Thanksgiving
Drive-Through Christmas Light Displays open
Reindeer or Nativity Animal petting zoos open
Family Fun Farms offer bonfires, sledding hills or shaved & blown snow in southern states
You-Pick farms begin to offer Strawberry picking (Dec in Gulf Coast states, March in others)
Year Round
Locally owned eateries offer delicious food with unique seasonal menus
Old fashioned ice cream and soda shops make for a fun, quaint outing
Town squares have live music and planned events most weekends
Nearby Camp Grounds are available almost every weekend per year (requires booking in advance)
Large Farmer’s Markets may offer year-round seasonal produce, bakery items, soaps and gifts
Canoe Rentals on large rivers operate nearly year-round as long as the river has enough water flow
Fishing in local lakes and creeks (check state laws on what fishing licenses are needed)
How a Country Move Can Boost Your Marriage
I would have never guessed that our move would have helped our marriage but it did. Moves are naturally stressful times but once we were unpacked and settled in, I began to notice a change. Everything was new. We had to work together to learn how our septic system functioned. The farmhouse had a faucet, garbage disposal, garage door opener and light switch that needed immediate replacing, which we completed together. After wind storms we both donned work gloves and picked up the dead branches that had fallen around our property. During one particularly bad downpour, where we learned the underground gutter drains were clogged with leaves, we worked side by side with shovels to keep water flowing away from our home. (Notice that things were not perfect but even the problems we faced seemed to bring us together!) We selected fruit trees and determined where was the best place to plant them. I helped my husband with the chicken coop and garden build. Before long our weekend to-do lists became projects we looked forward to completing with each other. While I considered myself happily married before, in the country I realized I was living in absolute marital peace. We were communicating well, functioning as a team and enjoying projects that fostered a sense of real companionship between us. I have noticed similar loving marriages in my neighbors and I truly believe there is something to be said for country life supporting a healthy marriage.
Will My Family Be Happy in the Country?
While I cannot guarantee that your individual family will be happy, I can assure you the country is going to provide plenty of ingredients that could contribute to a wholesome and fulfilling lifestyle. The constant contact with nature, closer living to the earth, the seasons and the locally produced food plus outdoor activities that naturally refresh the senses are a good foundation for promoting peace and happiness within the family. I understand the risk or gamble you feel you may be taking. We had lived for ten months in our new home before I could confidently say our family had changed for the better and we were truly thriving. The changes were gentle and slow but increasingly apparent as time passed. As you take the leap of faith to move your family to where your heart is calling you, I hope you enjoy the same familial bliss that we have experienced!
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